As far as I can tell, the major issue is my pregnancy weight gain. We have three kids between the ages of three and six, and I gained about 100 pounds through the three pregnancies. I’ve lost about 45lbs since my youngest was born, but it’s taken three years to get there, and half of that is since BD. I always knew my weight bothered H, but he never really said anything, and I never prioritized myself. The last I heard about my weight was right after the youngest was born, and I thought I was making progress. I was also overweight when we first started dating, which makes things more confusing. He wasn’t physically attracted to me—he said he was attracted to who I was as a person.
Hi Lost Rose, I'm so sorry you're going through this. You're obviously not alone in facing BD nor being overweight. We're here to help. Post often to get things off your chest or ask advice.
So, you were attractive enough he married you and had three children.
Losing weight is great--it facilitates being active, reduces health risks, and makes dating easier. I wonder what else made "who you were as a person" when you met. Were you prioritizing yourself? Were there aspects of your life that you loved then but not now, that you wish that you could have back?
