So question for the group. Kids just told me mom is dating someone and they hang out as a ‘family’. I’ve never met this person. I feel that I should know who my kids are getting introduced to as romantic partners.
W has done nothing to pursue divorce.
Jesus H Christ. I'd remind your kids of the rules of marriage and family. This is an intruder.
Originally Posted by Vapo
For all intents and purposes you are divorced. You just don't have a paper that says so. Yet. You have to let go of your desire to know who your wife is dating. It could be that it is some kind of a weirdo, but the chances of that are very slim. Most likely you just want to meet the guy to see what he has and you don't because your W replaced you with him. It's not you, it's her.
Don't you go on "feeling" her pain. It is HER pain, not your. Do what is best for you, protect yourself and protect the kids.
Stay strong buddy...
I just disagree with the first sentence. What about the intent of getting things wrapped up legally? I doubt LB and Mrs. LB jumped into marriage quickly, or told people they were married for all intents and purposes when they were just dating or engaged. You don't get out of a marriage with the snap of your fingers because you spoke a few words that would be a relationship breakup outside of marriage.
I think we perpetuate a false narrative when we validated a WS's feelings that the marriage is over. You can "feel like" it's over but that goes against reality. You aren't on "home base" simply because you BD'd your spouse.
The rest of your post I like.
Originally Posted by LB55
I do not care that she is seeing someone nearly as much as I care that the kids are using the word stepdad.
Stepdad? Seriously? Again, I'd educate the kids on marriage and the rules of it. Your W may not believe in them but you kids should.
Everyone feel free to help me if I'm missing something.
H 34 W 29 BD 3/12/18 Divorce Busted Spring 19
It is not things that bother us, but the stories we tell ourselves about things.
