When I said I don’t care. It’s more of like I feel done. I’m not mad. I’m not sad (except for how I explained earlier). I enjoy being around my boy. But I don’t really enjoy being around her any more. She doesn’t like who I am. I’m energetic and goofy and adventurous and spontaneous and a little to loud. But that’s me. She doesn’t like that. And that’s ok. If she is sleeping with someone else fine by me. She wants to be done. If I ask her if she is in an A she will deny it. I don’t have means to prove it. I prolly never will. Why would I continue to live like this?
I really am just tired. Like genuinely tired. Maybe I overestimate our friendship. She told me. “I didn’t sight up for this”. Talking about my cancer on night of BD. It’s all sinking in. She really genuinely can’t handle it. She is broken and refuses to be fixed
I’m ready to walk away. Like I said. No emotion why am I standing here for someone who doesn’t want to be with me. Maybe there is someone out there who does. Maybe there isn’t. All I know is this isn’t right she nixed our M when she broke the vows of it. Why am I standing here trying to un-void the contract. Does that make sense.
