I wouldn't read into the friends thing. My H, who I call OD, hated his family. Never had anything to do with them. From the second he left here, it is all about that family for him. They need someone. They know they are a mess. They are afraid to be alone because that is when the demons come. They need someone to tell them they did the right thing and their feelings are justified. Even those friends figure out in time they are FOS.
My advice--in every moment, do what feels the right thing for you and your kids. Try to let go of what he wants, or the whys (but I admit it is fun to borrow Andrew's turban and mind-read--I do it all the time). Don't start thinking that the friend thing is a reconnection thing or this attention means he's coming back soon. He isn't. If he ever does, it is years away. Live your best life between now and then. You may find something better yourself in the meantime, and even if you don't you'll be more attractive him when he gets his you-know-what together. Assume everything is just a touch-and-go and about their fears until you wake up one day with definitive proof to the contrary.
If I'm not mistaken, yours is the one who moved out temporarily for only a month or three or whatever, and has now bought a house with a mistress you didn't know about. Sounds a lot like my H. Terrified to let go, complete coward. Hoping all the time someone else will do the dirty work. What he wants is going to change a million times between now and the end, so be guided by what you want.
