Holy Cow!!!!! What happened??????

[Jim1234]

Sat down yesterday afternoon with STBXW at an outdoor cafe and had a nice chat for a few hours. Of course we discussed the emails I sent her about not feeling important to her. Overall it was a nice conversation. Even the discussion about the emails was pleasant and nonconfrontational. She expressed fear that my emails indicated I was reverting to pre DB behavior. I validated, let her know that guy was gone forever, thanked her for leaving me so I could learn how pathetic he was, and asked her to let me know if she thought he was returning. I also very plainly and very clearly let her know that her actions didn't back up her words, and if she expected me to want to reconcile, that needed to change. When my parking meter expired, I politely told her I was driving up to the cabin for the night, had to get on the road, and left.

We still intend to get divorced. At this point it's just a piece of paper and it can be easily changed. All we're waiting on is for my retirement fund to be divided per the QDRO, which was projected to have been finished last week (don't know what the holdup was and don't really care), and then the final dissolution of marriage paperwork, which should take another week or two.

I feel great. Nice night at the cabin. Got the work done that needed doing, and if she wants to do the work, great. And if not, that's great, too.