This is so unfair for a 13 year old to have to go through all of this-- she is so lucky to have you as her dad. I agree that she is absolutely your priority and keeping her in counseling is a must. Seems like your XW is not capable of making decisions in the best interest of her child and maybe you will have to go the lawyer route-- not that I know anything about it, but just from what you've written I can't imagine that a judge would not give you full custody. The stakes are too high.
You know you are doing the best you possibly can for your daughter and being the best dad you can. Try just to focus on her. One thing my friend is doing with his D11 that seems to be helpful is she knows that she can call him anytime, day or night, and he'll drive over to his XW house and get her, talk, or give her whatever she needs. That has helped her to be less anxious about being at her house. He also has taken a couple of days off of work just to hang out with her and spend time together, which he said seems to really be helping her confidence in knowing he is always there for her regardless of the mom and stepdad situation. (she has also talked about hurting herself.)
Last edited by job; 09/27/1909:58 PM. Reason: added space between paragraphs
Me (46) H (42) M:14 T:18, D9 & D11 4/19 - 12/19: series of escalating BDs 9/20 - present: R and piecing
