Curtis, good luck, keep an open mind and no expectations and everything should go smoothly!
Originally Posted by curtis7
I hear you loud and clear. I needed the calibration. You nailed it on my hope if we were to complete the program. The 80% success rate is for couples that BOTH want to do the work. I am at an extreme handicap, a 1% long shot.
Yes 1% is probably right. RIGHT NOW. I am not trying to steal your hope away, just give you more realistic expectations of your timeline. The chances of recon right now are very, very poor. But as time goes on and you detach and she explores herself then the chances keep getting better. I just didn't want to see you pin your hopes on this or anything else too soon because that leads to disappointment, and disappointment can be so devastating for a LBS. So keep your eyes on the horizon, that's where your hope is. For now just do your thing.
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Things feel awfully surreal with WW this week. Very little interaction and communication. On Monday she texted asking about the plan for my mom watching the kids while we go to RetroV. She said this was getting super inconvenient as we are going to miss D5’s soccer game on Friday, S8’s fall baseball opening day on Saturday, and she’s not able to attend a software training seminar for work that she planned before I brought up attending the weekend. I validated in response and she replied that she is not looking forward to this at all with a frown emoji. I asked if it was because she didn’t know what to expect and she replied I don’t know.
All very solid signs that she is still firmly in the WAS camp. She's just not ready to recommit. It's unfortunate but not surprising. In my case it was my XW that requested to go, but she was likewise not committed to it or working on the M.
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I have been getting a little different vibe from her lately sort of like she doesn’t mind being around me. Imagine that, feeling like your W isn’t repulsed being around her H.
That's pretty typical, they all run hot and cold. That's why we call it the roller coaster! Don't get excited when she's at the top and don't get depressed when she's at the bottom. You stay to the side on firm ground while she rides up and down.
