Gerda's Prayer Takes the Form of Angels

[Gerda]

I was very nervous going to court yesterday, so I literally forced myself to remember what you said about fear, DnJ. It helped a little. At one point in court I was texting a friend who was making jokes and I said I would like to laugh but may have to vomit, and he said that he would worship me if I was able to vomit on H's lawyer. This made me laugh but also helped me get detached, realizing that something that seems horrible, e.g., vomiting in court, would in this case actually be pretty awesome.

I can't even begin to explain what happened yesterday, it was the worst appearance yet. The screaming and the lying. H is threatening to come back Oct 1, and his L is going with it. At one point was screaming at me, "What floor do you want to take? Pick one! Which floor are you going to live on because he is taking the other one."

But his L told my L at one point that because of my letter to the friend's wife, they are not paying H's legal bills anymore!!! What a victory! And twice my H blew up and had to leave the court room (we were not on record, just battling on the side or with the court attorney) because he was so angry. I was just calm and looking at my book or my lawyer though a couple times I admit I had to plug my ears listening to the lawyers scream at each other. And at one point when H left the courtroom, his L leaned over to my L and said, "Please settle this case! I can't stand this guy anymore!"

The conference was adjourned to Oct 23 so as a result my H filed an emergency motion for me to pay his rent this month. I started by an offer of $0 per month, raised it to $1000 and finally to $1250. No go, he wants his whole rent paid and makes demands like me moving out and him running the rentals. Then the court attorney asked if I could pay his rent for Oct so he'd have 30 days to find a more reasonable apartment. I said I could try but H said no to that too, that I have to pay his rent til we settle, and it has to be that expensive apartment. Everyone keeps saying to him, Why don't you get a job? He proudly assets he has one and it only pays $18000 a year. Everyone keeps suggesting he work more than two days a week. Then more screaming. I keep pointing out that even if we put the house on the market right now, it will be 6 months to a year before he sees any money. More screaming and lying about me hiding money. I keep asking my lawyer to ask them for documents showing this mystery money and he keeps saying that that doesn't happen til trial.

It is so weird that this is legal, and that taxpayer dollars are going to enable the court to stand by while this goes on!

At the end they had closed the court for lunch and we were still trying to get H to agree to something reasonable out in the hall. And at one point, me and my L and his assistant were listening to H and his L literally screaming at each other around the corner of the hall until H stormed out of the courthouse. This is a huge beautiful 19th century building with many levels and galleries overlooking the spaces below that is always in movies and TV shows. So picture that while you are picturing this!