We provide this useful Welcome Posting to each and every poster that comes here. The list of links that I posted are not books...they are threads/postings by our forum members. They will offer you valuable information to help you through the days to come and may even offer you some answers to your questions.
Now, to the nitty gritty, you need to provide more information so that we can assist you. For example, how old is your h? Has anything happened in the last 18-24 months that may have triggered his thinking that he is unhappy w/the relationship/marriage. For example, death of a co-worker, friend and/or family member? Birth of a child, empty nester, health issues, loss of a job or a new promotion, bankruptcy, class reunion, etc.?
Sounds like he may have met someone. Have you noticed him using he phone or the computer more often? Trying to convince him to see a therapist right now will not work. He doesn't think he's got an issue and he's not ready to seek help for that unhappiness or the relationship.
I suggest that you give him plenty of space and time to work out his issues. Try to refrain from discussing the relationship and divorce. While he is doing that, you need to keep the focus on you, watch your bank accounts and credit card statements. I would also suggest seeing out a lawyer to see what your options are if a divorce proceedings are initiated. Whatever you learn, do not share it w/him. The same applies to this site. This site is for you to come here, ask questions and take away from the discussions what can assist you.
Dig deeper for patience, keep the focus on you and try not to over analyze his every word or action. Remember, actions speak louder than words.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
