Can I also suggest you never again tell her to calm down. This could infuriate her too, and she'll see it as patronising. If it reaches the stage where you need to say this, you're better walking away.
Don't worry about what she called you. I think it's projection. I got called a 'money hungry c--t'; a few times by my XW. Let it all wash over you, and do your boundaries.
Me: early 40's XW: nearly 50 T: 15 M: 5 BD: Jan 19 S:10 SS: 22 SD: 24
