Well legally it is her house so she entitled to live there until she’s off the deed.
As for the talk I’m not sure what you are trying to accomplish with the talk? Can you explain?
I feel I'm ready to be done with all this as it looks like this is a long term affair, maybe 2+ years. I feel that she's looking to be gone once the S is out of the house, since shes BD'd once my S said he wasn't going into the army (now he's going air force in November) and I believe that stop her plan to leave in July ( my daughter told me that about 3 years ago, W said if we divorced, it would be once they were both out of the house.)
So if she's really done with us, I'm ready for divorce.
My question is that if she's against divorce and wants to continue things how they are, living here a few days a week and with the the rest, do I let her know then that I know of him and this can't continue? ( I'm not trying to kick her out of the home we both own).