It's exhausting just reading all you're going through. Living through that would be H-E-DoubleHockeySticks.
Originally Posted by "Zip"
Wrote a list of what I want and she is hitting 25% of the list at best. Could she be at 80%, yes, will she?.
It won't happen unless and until she wants to be married to you. When she wants out is definitely NOT the time to unload on her a list of things she's doing wrong / should change to be with you.
It's amazing how much a partner will change when they choose you!
Originally Posted by "Zip"
"as I look in my past, i found as one door closes that i wanted to stay open, there seems another always comes open that is a better option to what I thought was good"
Nope. What was your goal in sending it? You can always share ideas here before implementing them. In these situations often sitting on your hands is better than doing something rash.
Originally Posted by "Zip"
Our convo today was that she wanted to RSVP for a wedding, She pretty much told me I shouldnt go as i may stir up drama. This is what took us to where the D stands.
Was SHE invited or were YOU invited? If you were BOTH invited, she decides for herself if she goes, and you decide for yourself if you go. This shows you don't control her and she doesn't control you. You are both individuals free to make choices! A wedding is a social occasion where you get to catch-up and meet people.
Originally Posted by "Zip"
I saw her this afternoon and told her i now know what she meant by the docs and it was to be attached to the filing, She then said she didn t know what she was doing and she wasnt going to talk about it. this would have been a good time to discuss being we has an empty house.
Except, DB'ing says to drop the pressure and relationship talks. Case A: She's lying and knows exactly what she's doing--then there's nothing to talk about. When she files, you'll see what she's asking for and can approve or reject it. Your lawyer will advise you of your rights and take any protective measures necessary. Case B: She's being honest and doesn't know what she's doing, as evidenced by the mixed signals. You're pressuring her to make a choice when it probably won't go in your favor. Why?! Drop the pressure.
