Deciding When To Move On

[Traveler]

Hi HrtHsbnd,

Any successes or failures trying to validate your ex and her parents?

You are right, it is VERY hard. Any ideas on how to make it easier?

I'm reading a new book on listening. One tip it gives--before validation come naturally--is to memorize a stock phrase or three. In a heated moment it's easier to recall a specific reply like "Wow, you really feel XXX." than to recall "Don't be defensive" and come up with a good response on the spot.