Hi sandi. Thanks for your response. To answer your questions:
I’m not inviting her over for dinner. She just shows up to eat dinner whenever she pleases. It’s her house too, although right now she’s living in a hotel. So I cannot really just lock her out of the house. She has her own key. And yes, she also comes by the house to do laundry and to play with the dogs. And I promise I won’t hide from her!
I’m assuming she was saying that I was too controlling and selfish in our relationship. I have copped to it though, and I can see how she would think I was selfish and controlling. So that is certainly I’m working on, and I believe this was a “wake up” call for me in that respect.
You say that the point is to “create a more interesting, even mysterious man.” I totally get that, but sometimes I feel like I should take a “softer approach” as you call it, and I try to be there for her and be happy and friendly so that she associates good feelings with me. I know this is not what your rules advocate, but it’s how I’m wired, I guess.
If I discover that her EA has turned into a PA, that would likely be a dealbreaker for me. The EA partner lives 1000 miles away, so it’s unlikely to turn into a PA anytime soon.
