I am so very sorry to hear about your BIL. I will keep you and your family in my thoughts and prayers.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
Thanks everybody. He had another stroke overnight and the prognosis is dire. They are tweaking his antibiotics and having another staff meeting Friday but honestly, I think it's just to give the family time to come to grips with the idea of pulling the plug on the ventilator. I'm personally hoping that if he's not going to survive, that he dies naturally before then so my sister doesn't have to make that awful decision.
It really teaches two things - we all live in the moment. None of us are guaranteed the future.
Second, there are benefits to cancer as a way to die. You have time to knock some things off your bucket list. You have a chance to reconcile with people in your life. You have time to plan for your survivors. Sudden deaths like this deprive everybody of that closure.
So sorry to hear that your BIL is in such a bad way and fully understand the way you're thinking.
You are really doing it tough at the moment. I hope you're getting and doing what you need for yourself in amongst being a tower of strength for others. I also hope those others know how lucky they are to have you in their lives.
On BD H52, W50 T27, M26 S21, D23 BD-9-Mar-16 D-15-Jan-18 Final-19-Apr-18 I am a storyteller. The story may do you no good. But a story is never for the listener. It is always for the one who tells
So sorry! My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.
Me 52, H53 Bomb drop 9/29/2014 Divorce from XH final 12/17/2014 Marriage #2 12/31/2019 5 adult (step)daughters (3 from XH's first marriage, 2 from current H's previous relationships) 6 grandkids