So surgery is too risky. They want to start chemo stat
Crikey. Stay tough Oz - you'll get through this mate. If you're comfortable telling here, where in Oz are you mate? If we're close we can have a drink together and I can keep an eye on you?
Me: early 40's XW: nearly 50 T: 15 M: 5 BD: Jan 19 S:10 SS: 22 SD: 24
Thanks guys. I really appreciate it. I don’t know what W is gonna do. I can tell you this makes it much easier to focus on myself. Her boss is a real trip. W dislikes her a lot. I think it is half true and half a cop out. Her boss is on a serious power trip right now. I also think W is not up to the challenge anymore. Its just too much for her. That’s a very early opinion though. She sat down last night and helped me write out questions for the doc and this phone call. She hasn’t abandoned me. Time will tell if she will
I can tell you. A deep dark fear of mine. If she leaves. Would any woman get involved with a guy who is actively fighting cancer. Could a woman invest herself in that. I’m not looking for that now trust me. But my battle is life long. There is no cure. Hopefully it just takes 20 years to get me. But could a woman put herself in that position? You know what I mean?
So I got what it takes to dB and fight this cancer at the same time. In fact it makes for an even better 180. Handling my crap and still being strong and standing tall.
My boss told me today. “I can’t believe the attitude you have with this. How well your handling it”
I got this
Cancer can kiss my A$$.
My W is sure gonna miss me if she decides to bolt.
I’m starting chemo prolly the end of this week. Doc said he is optimistic
So W and I just talked about my phone call with doc today. She got very stressed out when I said I’m starting chemo again. She said she had a very bad day at work. I said I’m sorry you had a bad day. She said I’ve had a bad 30 years (she is 30 years old). I reached out to rub her back a little. (She said she has been enjoying it lately so I know). But she said please don’t and got all angry sounding. She asked what I wanted from Arby’s. I told her. She just stormed off and left in car. I made a mistake. I said “what’s your problem” when she was acting all pissy
She said she is extremely stressed out about me going back on chemo. She is also acting like all the dB progress is gone and we are back at square 1. Very angry at me.
Thoughts?
Ps she said everything just hit her today. Like it all piled up it buried her today.
She was sending me nice texts at work this morning. Now this. Lol
There might be BD # 2 happening tonight. I think the cancer coupled with a terrible day at work has pushed her to the edge. She isn’t being disrespectful. But very angry acting. Or peeved or irritated or something. I want to nail it tonight as far as convo goes.
I'm sorry about all this Oz, but isn't that great your Dr is optimistic!
I think R2C was also kissing your cancer's butt.
I think you should have not said anything further about your C, other than you and your medical team have got it under control and have a plan of action. Like I said, I reckon she now sees it as a huge inconvenience.
Mate, stop rubbing her back. Stop touching her altogether. Stick a bloody rubber band on your wrist and every time you go to touch her, flick that thing against your skin.
You've got this mate. Keep your chin up!
Regds, D
Me: early 40's XW: nearly 50 T: 15 M: 5 BD: Jan 19 S:10 SS: 22 SD: 24
