Steve, I trust you have heard both perspectives in spite of any righteous indignation.
It's all clear as mud now.
Go your own way and as always, take what W says with a grain of salt. I support you regardless of your decision.
M 53 W 54, M since 98 D15, D19 8/2013 discovered EA, W maintained contact with OM until 10/14 7/2/17 W said she wanted S, 7/25/17 moved out of MBR 12/17 W says moving out 5/18, W still in home.