4 months in....(Re: Advice needed)

[peacetoday]

and if he is seeing the OW on a regular basis and dating her...

you may want to rethink your position when the time comes

giving them space is one thing..and deciding how long you want to live with this kind of thing is another-
just my opinion

it would be seriously hard to know he is with OW and coming home to you as if nothing happened
A divorce busting coach might be useful right now-
The relationship probably wont work but these affairs can last for a time-
Its a question of do you want to ride it out

I think the reconciliation rate for the spouse living at home is higher -but nothing is guaranteed

When MY XH did this--I was in the dark- In denial about OW-
If I was aware..Im sure it would have been even harder-

stay strong
The goal is your healing and sanity
and the kids adjusting and thriving no matter what