Hahaha! A lot of times we offer suggestions but don't say "why" we offer them, so let me explain. You approached her suggesting a schedule that was beneficial to both of you and she declined to talk about it so fine, YOU are going to take control of YOUR life no matter how she reacts to it. So if she refuses to agree to an equitable suggestion, then you just tell her you are taking control of your half of it (your two or three evenings to yourself I mean) and could care less what she does with her half. She can take her time and you'll watch the kids, or she can blow it off, not your problem. This is you asserting that you will NOT be controlled and bullied by her, and it is also you saying you are not going to sit around moping at home while she sows her wild oats. OF COURSE she will not like it, but inside a seed of respect will have been planted, and over time as you remain consistent in your ways that respect will continue to grow.
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I said that almost word for word. I didn't say "It's what you want." She always says, "You don't know what I want!!!" when I say stuff like that. Definite trigger!!
You're going to trigger her sometimes, because she is loaded and cocked and a good breeze is enough to trigger her. When it does trigger her then just go with the above, calmly but firmly state you will not be spoken to that way and if she continues then leave the room or the house. She's like a schoolyard bully hoping to get a reaction, and if she doesn't get one then eventually she'll tire of trying.
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I might have to go there to shoot (My fav activity) and bask in their discomfort. I'm not generally vengeful or spiteful but there hasn't been very much in the consequence bin for her and nothing at all for him so it might be somehow deeply gratifying in a really sadistic, dark place in my otherwise pure heart...
LOL! Well I don't know about that, but hopefully you get to a place where you just don't care. You are fine going and doing your thing and you don't care if one or both of them is there, and you don't care what they think about you being there. I mean in the end that is the ultimate revenge, you living your awesome life no matter how crazy she gets.
