Yes, Steve, no matter the outcome, you will be more than just okay. You will be great.

Do you see her behavior (enjoying attention from OM) as a "relapse" in that it disappeared and then resurfaced? Or is it possible that it has been there and you didn't know? Or more so, even if she was not engaging in it, could it be that it is something she continued to want? I guess I find it telling that she said outright that she enjoys it and thinks you should accept it. That is bold, but also honest.

That idea alone would really bother me if it were my H. So even if I asked him to stop, and he did stop, it would bother me to know that he still craved the attention of OW. That is why I am asking.

I gave Neffer a hard time because he talked about overcoming the desire for OW and how it can take a long time. I know on a cerebral level that it makes sense, but I also know myself, and I just couldn't feel attraction to my H if I believed he craved attention/desire for any OW. I feel like after all the cr-p we have been through over the years, if he is here and with me, he better be sure it is what he wants. And he knows me well enough to know I am not interested in sharing -- that is not my jam.

Blu

“Forgiveness liberates the soul. It removes fear. That is why it is such a powerful weapon.” – Nelson Mandela