Blu is spot on. IMO. As I read through your last month's worth of post I see a man that is trying to sell his Ws last week's worth of actions to a group that has seen too much. We get it that you are in a better place this time. You seemed to be in a good state the last go-round. Blaming addiction or a troubled youth are not helpful. The fault is on your W. Best you can do is to create an atmosphere where she has the best chance of seeing this. It's always hard to see this in our own sitches.
I see indications that you are considering Persute acceptable. Wrong
Pull back. DB but let your intentions be ambiguous. IMO she hasn't felt enough pain. Yes I said that. Reread what Sandi has said about real reconciliation. Simply going to IC is not enough. I agree she needs to go but like everything, there are no guarantees, no quick fixes. She has to want it more than her EA quick-fixes of late. Right now she is behaving out of shock. So are you. This will change. Ws get good are throwing us off their trail. I have lived this for over a year now. Just as we can reduce pressure, there are things that they will do to reduce the pressure both on us and inturn on them. Don't fall for it.
Trust is going to be very difficult. What it will take, stands to be seen. Once again you are a long way from crossing that bridge.
Now you have 2 homes and a WW. Good behavior or not you are in a pile of poo. Make her pursue you. I know you can.
Well stated. Only complaint I have is that I'm not pursuing and not planning on it anytime soon. And she on trust, actually full trust may be impossible....... For a longgggggggggggggg time. I'm saying like 20 years.
I'm optimistically pessimistic, if that makes sense. I know she can fix it, but I don't know that she will.
Thanks again brother, appreciate the support, wisdom, and prayers.
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
