you've never stopped snooping. You've never given her or yourself space. Don't confront her. Instead, let her go. You've had the death grip around her since day one. Let her go.
In her mind you aren't in a "MR". In the practical sense she is right. On paper you are right. Why not get rid of the horse and keep her out of your house and out of your life for the time being?
This confrontation is going to lead to further lack of respect.
This last post is pure emotion. I know you're hurting. I've been there. Sorry Curtis.
H 34 W 29 BD 3/12/18 Divorce Busted Spring 19
It is not things that bother us, but the stories we tell ourselves about things.
