Ozman, re: surprising your partner in bed doesn't require being freaky, buying expensive pills or gadgets, or mastering special techniques. I find it just takes playful curiosity and watching how your partner reacts. I suggest.. ice play! It's unintimidating and encourages extending fore-something or another which is fun for both. If you Google a few stories about it, you'll learn from other peoples' mistakes (frostbite) and brilliancies (pairing it with warmth) and do better than the average joe. With this or anything else new, start S-L-O-W. I often check-in afterwards if their response to what I tried anew wasn't obvious.
