Thanks all for the kind words. We leave on vacation today. S is crying, he says he didn't know W wasn't coming despite having told him many times it would just be the 3 of us. D is fine. S doesn't want to go at the moment but he will come around once we get moving. It's hard to experience but this is our new life. As for me, despite S's mood I am happy to be doing the trip without W, who would be trying to constantly control everything.
As a child of divorce I know the future off my little family of 3 will have its bumps in the road specifically due to the D, I am not envisioning ever really crossing the goal line and spiking the ball, even after my kids launch, but even parents in intact families never cross that line, you always worry to an extent and there are always issues. My mom's husband has kids in their 50's and there are still big issues.
I feel strong as an ox, mentally, emotionally, physically even in my advanced age :)…..but I can confide in this group that sometimes it's hard to be strong all the time. I have my moments of doubt and weakness. I have them privately and I let them come and pass like clouds on a mountaintop. When they pass I am still on the mountaintop. I think having those moments actually somehow makes me stronger overall, I can't explain why but I think its true. I'm not a Terminator, I'm human, and I accept my weaknesses and flaws and work on them and work to be better and stronger. I think its just part of the human experience, something that I want to embrace fully. Overall I like how I am feeling and I am so optimistic about what lay ahead for me and my kids.
