You’re right, it’s really hard for me to stop mind reading attempts. It’s just another way I try to soothe my anxiety with control and information. I also use it to try to keep my hopes in check. But I end up all over the place. And it’s so true, I have no idea what H is thinking at this point. I’m trying really hard to detach from my desire to figure it out. It’s so hard right now; this divorce process has been started, and I don’t want it to happen, so I’m back again to anxiously waiting to see what will happen next. My anxiety level is very high and I’m desperately trying to soothe myself, in all the wrong ways.
Last night H texted me before he got here to see D4. He said he had a bad day and he was stressed and had no energy, and asked if it was ok if he and D4 came back here a little earlier than usual. Kind of strange for sure. I just told him I’m sorry he is stressed and no I don’t mind. Not sure what that was about.
D4 and I are going with 2 moms and their kids to a lake cabin for a few days. I’m really looking forward to some time away and some relaxation.
