Divorce because I betrayed her trust - I regret it

[ovrrnbw]

I did not have emotional affairs with the 2 women. It was some dirty talk and some pictures. The only non-sexual thing was one of the women said something about her dog dying and I said I was sorry to hear that. But my W beleives that I'd "formed a relationship" with them.

I see them as emotional affairs. Sexting is cheating. You were walking down the path to a physical affair.

Porn....hhmmm. Not the end of the world to watch porn IMO, although it has been shown to be incredibly unhealthy for all people involved. You definitely crossed the line by paying for pics.

As for the home sale, why are you lining everything up on this? Doesn't your W want out? Let her do that work and have plans when she asks you to be there to meet the estate agent.

I have to show her the new me

It's going to take a long time before you are the new you. You are still a work in progress. Trust me, big changes take time. The best thing you can do is stay focused and humble.

She hates porn in any form, and says that me being on these sites and commenting in a vulgar manner on some of the models etc means that I hate women and don't value our marriage and prefer them to her.

I can see how she could feel that way, can you? Learn to validate these types of feelings she is having.

Quit fighting her on just trying separation. I don't think it's working, do you? She may be getting advice to end things, but you can't worry about it. It won't do a thing but hurt you. So let it go. I know you want to fix things and you know how to and you can fix them right now...but you can't. So let it go. She says lots of conflicting things, right? It's because she is emotionally hurt and has ups and downs. So let it go. Now go work on being strong and attractive.