Fine tuning my inner Me

[DnJ]

Hello Grace

I’m sorry about the loss of appetite and the knotted stomach; it’s a tough slog. All pains along the path to acceptance; perfectly normal and perfectly healthy.

You seem to gravitate towards understanding, something I think is key to letting go and accepting. Looking for the why of things. To me you’re removing another layer of denial, with that come a bit of shock and depression. Again very normal, and so very healing. Walk through and experience the pain and emotions, and continue to let them wash over you.

I am very please, and proud of you, to see that you are not firing all that ammo at H. Hurting and embarrassing him, might feel good for a little while - and that is a pretty small might, and very short lived. The regret from doing such a thing is another item you would have to accept and forgive yourself for later, and you do not need those self placed boulders in your path.

Besides, along with choosing better instead of bitter, which is so much for you, H will most likely be more amicable when negotiating. I know, icky feeling. Intellectual car - perform this business deal ethically and intelligently, you will be grateful you did.

As you know, this will pass, and your appetite will return in time. Speaking of hurting tummies - mine is a bit upset. While mowing grass today, every time I rode by the apple trees I picked and ate one the juicy fresh apples. After nine of them, I felt a little icky, and had to stop eating. Oh, but they were sooo good. I did think of you, as I gorged myself, both as apple loving friend and nurse with admonishing wagging of her finger. An apple a day is good - nine not so much. I fear these will pass too.

DnJ