You are forcing this Rville situation. Listen, you having to do a lot of convincing to get her to go. You are almost having to drag her there. She has not committed to going or doing the work. I really think you think, if you just get her there she will see the M is important, she will come around. But, I think she will more than likely rebel more. She is in full on rebellion.
Your W is way off from Rville. She's not ready and if you blow that card now when/if she does become ready it might leave a bad taste in her mouth for later on.
You are ready to ask for NC with OM, but you didn't even bring him up. You had an opportunity to lay it all out, but you back tracked. Your WW, hasn't shown any remorse, and actually, she explained to you, that she is deep in fantasies, more than one. Your WW hasn't shown any signs of commitment, so you are not in the right timeframe or spot to ask for NC. Your WW don't even know you know about him.
You are TOOO worried about what you WW will do. The hold DB process is about YOU getting better, healing, and becoming attractive again.
You were telling her what you wanted, while she was telling you what she's going to do and not do. And nothing she has said or done, amounts to her wanting to come back.
Let me state the above again. You were telling your wife (talking not doing) what you wanted. And you WW was telling you what she will and won't do (HER ACTIONS). Her actions and your wants, are far apart.
Break contact, cancel the Rville (for now) and focus on detaching and GAL without your WW.
onward and forward
M:37 W:37 T:11 M:10 S17, S13, S10, S4 BD:06/28/17 OM confirmed 07/20/17 Recon the M 10/29/17 Working hard:2gether
Onward and forward
This process is not a sprint it's a marathon! Patience, Patience, Patience.
