But I'm sorry, if I break all emotions then what's the point?
Detaching does not mean you turn your feelings off. You are going to continue having feelings for a long time, maybe for the rest of your life. You're losing someone you loved and you're losing your home, that's a hell of a thing to go through. Own your feelings, let them happen. Grieve, cry, whatever it takes to process it. Just FYI I've been divorced for many years and we're going through an office remodel, I was going through my desk (which I haven't done this deeply in 15 years) and found a lot of old family photos. Pictures of XW and the kids at the beach, hiking, playing in the yard. Man that really hit me hard. I miss the wife I had back then, and I miss those wonderful little kids we were raising together. My kids are grown now and I love them to pieces, but I loved those little versions of them too and I loved being a dad and caring for those little kids, the little moments like corralling them into mom's van to take to lunch or the park or whatever. I miss that younger version of myself! They're great memories but they hurt too, it makes me sad. That's not to say I don't enjoy the life I have now, I really do. But it does make me sad sometimes that my life didn't stay on the married trajectory it was on.
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On a positive note, the house I wanted to buy I'll probably get. It's a really amazing place, D3 will have her own room (and then some). Nice neighborhood.
Awesome! Good luck, hope it all works out on it!
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Weird thing - my mom planned family photos for this Saturday pre-D announcement. I figured that W would not want to participate but I don't really care one way or another. My mom called to say that W would come if I didn't mind. Like, on what planet does it make sense for the leaver to want to be in the LBS's family photos??? Frankly, I don't care one way or another, I just don't get it.
That sounds exactly like things my XW did after S and D. I think she wanted to hold onto some piece of the old life. You can let her or you can shut it down, that's your choice. Personally I don't think it matters much one way or the other, it's really a question of how it affects you.
