Moving on to the Brightside Part 29

[Coconut]

J9

What were the self-sabotaging urges?
Did you struggle at all with wanting to be alone and therefore secure vs being in a relationship and the vulnerability associated with it?

kml - thanks for your input as well. I am trying to put some internal conflict at ease and all responses help.

The first thing I’ve done almost every time I’ve met someone new is to wonder if I could do better, but I recognized that automatically puts me on the defensive causing me to put on the breaks.. one thing 2 yrs of dating has taught me is people almost always aren’t what you expect them to be. Now, I look at a lady and try to find something I find attractive, boobs, eyes, body, personality, whatever.. if I can find something, anything that physically makes me want them, I will ask them out. I want more than anything to be emotionally attracted to a woman, but I know that I have to find something physically attractive about them to be able to solidify the relationship.