I get where you are coming from. I filed cuz I don’t want to be married to the person she has become. I want to be with who my W was. However that person is gone and I have no idea if or when she will come back. I filed for that reason. I don’t want to be stuck in limbo with the person I no longer respect, if she can work on her issues and become similar or better than her previous self, great. If not, D is the best option for me.
I agree though, I shouldn’t care what she thinks or does but idk being disrespected like that made me angry. The same way I would feel if anyone else in the world said that to me. Maybe that’s just how I am but I know I should have a better reign on my emotions.
I do however want to document our interactions and her reactions. Reading others situations and interactions around my BD was monumental in helping me understand what was going on and what to expect. If others reading my sitch feel less alone or learn anything at all from it, I will be glad.
I will add however, that for the first time since BD, I feel that I am the one in control. And it is a huge weight off of my shoulders.
Thanks
I know it was hard to file for D since it probably wasn't what you wanted but it was probably for the best. I feel the same about my situation, it was filed last Friday - we were both cordial on it. I was torn inside but I had so many mixed feelings (anger, disgusted, betrayed, etc.) I couldn't look past on what she has done to me but in my heart I still love the woman, just not the one she has become.
I come here for a lot of support and you guys have been awesome. It definitely makes me feel less lonely given the circumstances. Even small updates, I'll post on here because I know I'll get a straight response/advice instead of beating around the bush.
It probably took a lot of strength for you to file but if you feel that was the right thing to do, more power to you. Especially since you mention that a huge weight has been lifted off your shoulder, a feeling of relief.
Keep working on your S and yourself. Stay positive, you'll come out as a bigger and better man.
