That is all incredibly rough with a 2.5 yo. I've got two small kids at home, and the idea of someone breaking up a young family without even trying to fix it is so hard to accept! I also understand that it is harder to be in limbo when you have a toddler. Waiting around for someone to make up their mind is brutal when you have to figure out childcare, and watching a toddler doesn't leave much room at all for GAL.
As long as you get the S agreement in place, I wouldn't push for a D. But ask for everything you want! This is legal, not emotional. Don't worry about upsetting her. Ask for as much money as you can get - you can always decrease it in the future. Some of the things I'll go after in my D will likely destroy any chance of R (not a big loss at this point), but my priority has to be taking care of myself and my kids for the future.
