So almost relationships are horrible. I am very clearly in one with W.
I was in an almost relationship with a girl for 9 months once. It stunk I finally told her that I had feelings for her and we had to be a couple or nothing. Cause I couldn’t just be her friend. She left and I never saw her again
oz, obviously I think you should give this more time to see if she comes around. But you need to realize that eventually you may need to make a similar stand with your W. I say give it a good year. If nothing changes, then make it known you are not interested in remaining platonic. Just be prepared to move forward NO MATTER WHAT SHE DECIDES. This is what your goal for the next 10 months is. To get to a place where you are so awesome that you will continue to be awesome no matter what ends up happening with your MR!
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
I walked up the stairs without her hearing me the other day. I came around the corner and she hurriedly closed out of FB messenger. I could be something. It could be nothing. But an alpha doesn’t worry about these things right?
I finally told her that I had feelings for her and we had to be a couple or nothing. Cause I couldn’t just be her friend. She left and I never saw her again
Talking never works. Actions work. "Nice guys" do not know how to take the right actions at the right time. You need to learn this.
"What is best for my kids is best for me" Amor Fati Link to quotes: https://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2879712
I walked up the stairs without her hearing me the other day. I came around the corner and she hurriedly closed out of FB messenger.
Why are you bringing up the other day? You should have brought it up with us the day it happened. Stay in the present with us.
Today is Friday. What are going to do tonight? What about Saturday/Sunday? Please do not bore me. If you bore me, youw ill bore your W. You do not want to be boring.
"What is best for my kids is best for me" Amor Fati Link to quotes: https://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2879712
I walked up the stairs without her hearing me the other day. I came around the corner and she hurriedly closed out of FB messenger. I could be something. It could be nothing. But an alpha doesn’t worry about these things right?
I wouldn't worry, but I would note it. Your W has BD'd you, has a male friend at work, and isn't engaged in any intimacy with you. Then you catch her closing out of FB Messenger quickly when you come into the room. RED FLAGS
This doesn't change anything you should be doing, but it does seem to suggest the strong likelihood of an EA. Be vigilant and observant. But also just keep up DBing...hard.
I would resist the urge to snoop. Those of us that have done it have later regretted it. Some things you can't unsee.
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
Ok thanks Steve. I can’t prove anything. I can’t disprove anything. Her behavior really suggests she is NOT in an A. The Facebook messenger thing does. I also know she has many friends. Including her sisters who FB messenger her.
If she isn’t I look like an a$$ if I accuse her right? Her actions throughout the day do not say A. But who knows. Cause most of these sitches there is OP involved right?
I can see why just forgetting about it for now and DBing and being alpha and super interesting is the best policy for now. Because snooping and spying and wondering sounds like a long dark road.
And we are getting along so well I don’t want to mess that up. I get to try attraction and seduction techniques R2C keeps talking about because she can’t hide the fact that she enjoys being around me.
It’s about me. I gotta improve.
This weekend I’m taking S to a fair type thing. I told W about it. No idea if she is gonna come or not. But I’m not changing my plans.
Gonna work on my truck. Gonna run. Gonna go to a car show. Mud run. All of that this weekend
Ps. Steve. Did you get to the point where if your W would have left you it would have just rolled off your shoulders?
I suffer from an extremely potent case of untreated undiagnosed nice guy syndrome. I fit the description to a tee. It should be renamed ozman disorder
HAHA this is unbelievable
Whoever told me to get the NMMNG book. You deserve an honorary PhD.
W went to girlfriends house for a couple hours. For what it’s worth I 100 percent believe her. Still unsure about an A. But check it. Right now I don’t even care I’m going over to some friends house. We are gonna play cards and have some beers. I’m pretty pumped.
Time to shake some core beliefs!!
Forget the past! It was miserable. I just didn’t know it!