If you've read it then you don't have to go back, my point is just that Steve's wife said all the same stuff as yours and now he's reconciled. She spewed script with the best of them. But she still changed her mind later. MANY of them DO change their mind. Will yours? We can't tell you with certainty, and we can't tell you when it will happen if it does. But like many LBS's, you seem to take everything she says as permanent. "Well she said XYZ so it really is over, there's no chance". I hear it around here so much, but the fact is you do not know the future. I've seen marriages come back from situations that seemed virtually impossible, much farther off the deep end than yours.
Listen to AS here. This is good stuff. I should quote this in R2C's quote thread.
jac, here is the thing. WASs/WSs do not like to give up on the "dream" they had. They will not let it go easily. ESPECIALLY VERBALLY.
In my sitch, My W's actions started to change. She was initiating sex....a lot. She start cooking family dinners again. She started making future plans for us as a family. She even started keeping the house much better, which was a common point of contention between us, and she completely stopped doing housework once her EA started.
But if I had asked her early on (and I made this mistake a couple of times if you read my threads), she still would say she wanted to be D'd and on her own. Once that switch flipped in her where she no longer wanted to be married, she didn't want to give that up...and even when her actions started showing she was changing her mind, her words didn't match that.
Jac and other LBSs........words have NO meaning. DO NOT BELIEVE ANYTHING THEY SAY. NOTHING. Negative or positive.
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
