I would not blame yourself in any way This is his affair, his MLC, his inability to be honest with himself-
If it is true MLC as you suggest, It is my belief that nothing you can do will make them shift
If they are in deep love and infactuation with the OW as my XH was...there was literally nothing I could do
no pressure was the only thing that made him feel safe enough to engage in conversation and that helped our separation process.. Any confrontation on my part lead to a blowout
he was unapproachable
they say that pleading, begging, crying letting them know how much you love them does not help
Now, we each have to read as many books as possible, search the web for answers and make our best choice. What do we have to loose?
Would it help if you tried one last time to talk to him?
I actually think I did mention to my XH at one point aftrer he moved out and I knew he was with OW That he could come home He just looked at me and continued to get in his car to go back to her- It is a very tricky situtation and only a small few will actually return or try to return in time-
Many here would say no relationship talks..the MLCer sees that as pressure
and do we want them to stay out of guilt? or because they want to do the work This is your call and we will support you either way..
pray about it and others will come in to give opinions but as always it is our choice-
married 14 years H 42 bomb 2/07 IDLYA D final 3 /09 M ow D ow
