Do I tell her my goal for the relationship? She likely already knows I’d prefer to get back together. Don’t want to state something she already knows but don’t want to be unclear on my intentions either. I think I’m gonna go visit my work bud and see what he thinks. He’s never met my W. He’s been through this divorce process twice and has some good perspective to keep me from doing dumb things.
IMO, you do not tell her this. She's put you through a lot.
And what makes you think that she knows this already?
Originally Posted by LB55
She gave me time to do that. I can’t think forever or I just look indecisive, weak, and unable to make a decision.
How can she give you what is yours to take? She may have wanted an answer right then and there, but I guarantee she's changed her mind on it several times since then. No answer is an answer in and of itself. Plus, even if she were beating the door down tomorrow, you'd need a lot of consistency before you could believe anything.
Originally Posted by LB55
How the conversation would go. Would we be able to talk without poking each other about past hurts? Would we be able to walk away if needed? That kind of stuff.
Sounds like she is totally healed.
Originally Posted by LB55
If I don’t tell her what I want, then I’m back to being a NGS dude that doesn’t tell others his wants and needs and is angry because I never get what I want.
Do you believe, in this case, that asking for what you want will get you what you want? It's not NGS to protect yourself either. You know your situation best.
H 34 W 29 BD 3/12/18 Divorce Busted Spring 19
It is not things that bother us, but the stories we tell ourselves about things.
