Got it, and apologies if I came across as direct. One of the quibbles W and I have had is that she is seeing herself as "giving up" 50% of her time with D3 and that I should treat this as a sort of gift from her. I have several issues with this, not the least of which is that my state is a 50/50 default state (so she would have to prove that I shouldn't have D3 50% and with no abuse/drugs/etc. that would be difficult) and that she considers time spent with dad to build a solid relationship a loss of some kind. Was just curious about how others approached.
CC - No worries, I betrayed my sensitivity on this issue as I am sure some people would suggest I should have pushed for 50/50. I am in a trial separation at the moment so this is not all written in stone, but I understand the importance of establishing regular timeshare if things do evolve into a D.
The rationale for why 30 and not 50 is very long-winded, and specific to my our life circumstances. As part of my new outlook on life and goal of improving emotional awareness, I will admit I feel conflicting emotions about the arrangement. I'm just not convinced 50/50 would have been best for my kids at this moment. Also my 30% is heavily weighted towards weekends which are full days uninterrupted by school, so I feel good about the quality of time I am getting.
See, now I feel like I am being defensive...
For you... if you want 50/50, absolutely go for 50/50. Stand your ground. It doesn't matter what your W thinks. You are your daughter's father, you have equal rights. Are there states that don't start with 50/50 assumption?
