Jac, I know this all is miserable to go through and you feel the need to do SOMETHING to shake things up. But even if your W is having a go at the local football team, she wouldn't consider it an "affair" because she's already moved out and essentially fired you as H. Sure there's some paper filed somewhere saying you're still married, but to her that's just a pesky detail. So in her eyes if she's having no sex, a little sex, a lot of sex or an insane amount of sex, it's "NUNYA" (that's our office shorthand, if someone asks where we're going to lunch we say "nunya" which is short for "nunya business" ) So if you confront her she is very likely to set the record straight for you, that you are divorced in everyway except that pesky piece of paper, that you have no right to pry into what she is doing and in fact HOW DARE YOU snoop and make accusations etc. etc. You see where I'm going, it'll all just blow up in your face and you'll end up looking like the bad guy for even bringing it up.
An example of this sort of reaction was my EXWW when I confronted her with proof from the PI I hired. She literally told me "I cant be with a man I cant trust, how dare you have me followed "
M:16 T:21 H(me) 38 WW: 38 S11 D16 D19 Red Flags of A: March 2018 ILYBNILWY: August 4, 2018 Moved out of MBR: September 24, 2018 BD/Confirmation of A: October 31, 2018 D Filed: March 27, 2019
) So if you confront her she is very likely to set the record straight for you, that you are divorced in everyway except that pesky piece of paper, that you have no right to pry into what she is doing and in fact HOW DARE YOU snoop and make accusations etc. etc. You see where I'm going, it'll all just blow up in your face and you'll end up looking like the bad guy for even bringing it up.