Lilly - Regarding the communication stuff, I absolutely agree. Use e-mail for almost everything, and limit it to only necessary exchanges (kids, etc). Backup would be a call, text should be the last resort. Text messaging is the single worst form of communication, and I won't bore you with all the reasons why.
My W and I use e-mail, and set up a weekly call (with an agenda we share via e-mail ahead of time) to cover issues with the kids, finances, etc. It was awkward at first but clearly working well. We have cut out text almost entirely unless it's a "who what when where" logistic one. Text caused a ton of blow-ups previously.
Brief as possible, calm as possible. Once you start talking you will feel some relief. If the emotions swell up, take a breath, pause a beat, recognize the emotion, and stick to your plan. You can do this!
