Jac, I know this all is miserable to go through and you feel the need to do SOMETHING to shake things up. But even if your W is having a go at the local football team, she wouldn't consider it an "affair" because she's already moved out and essentially fired you as H. Sure there's some paper filed somewhere saying you're still married, but to her that's just a pesky detail. So in her eyes if she's having no sex, a little sex, a lot of sex or an insane amount of sex, it's "NUNYA" (that's our office shorthand, if someone asks where we're going to lunch we say "nunya" which is short for "nunya business" ) So if you confront her she is very likely to set the record straight for you, that you are divorced in everyway except that pesky piece of paper, that you have no right to pry into what she is doing and in fact HOW DARE YOU snoop and make accusations etc. etc. You see where I'm going, it'll all just blow up in your face and you'll end up looking like the bad guy for even bringing it up.
) So if you confront her she is very likely to set the record straight for you, that you are divorced in everyway except that pesky piece of paper, that you have no right to pry into what she is doing and in fact HOW DARE YOU snoop and make accusations etc. etc. You see where I'm going, it'll all just blow up in your face and you'll end up looking like the bad guy for even bringing it up.