jac12 - I am not an expert on WWs so don't take my advice as strong as what the vets here say:
1. Actions, not words. Ditch the script (or shorten it up). All of the "I will give you my effort, I will be able to forgive you" stuff - drop it. It won't register with her, words will just fly over her head. Wordiness implies weakness at a time you are trying to show strength. It muddies up the message.
"I am proceeding with S agreement because it has come to my attention you are having an A. When you are ready to work on the MR, let me know."
Don't use my words as a script, I'm just giving you an alternative to think about.
2. I also suggest you limit the time you spend trying to understand her behavior (although I know it can be helpful to some degree).
I am in complete agreement about setting hard boundaries.
