From what I see in all of this is that you react to whatever runs through you head. It may be thinking back on a real event that took place in your life, or it may be a dream. Dreams mean nothing, by the way. Reacting to them is not rational. Our brains are like in a state of insanity when we are dreaming. So, when you wake up, shake it off and go on about your day. Don't give a minutes thought about why you dreamed it or interpreting its meaning. You have enough reality problems, without focusing on dreams.

I've also noticed how your mood reflects whatever flashes through your head, whether someone says something negative or you think their behavior is b/c you don't measure up in some way. You have low self-esteem and depend on others to set the tone of your moods. I suppose most of us feel good when someone says something encouraging to us. I mean, who doesn't like encouragement? However, do you tend to over-think it........(whether the words or behavior was positive or bad). If someone says something negative, how far does it drag you down before you decide to take control over how you feel? At what point do you decide how much significance to give the negative words/attitude/actions? How much importance do you give it when the remarks are positive? People who are hyper sensitive have to learn to think of the alternative possibilities. I think someone posted to you about that subject.

Now, before I make this next statement, please don't see it as me finding fault with you, okay? I'm not near as observant you appear to be, but I couldn't help but notice how quickly the tone of your posts became positive after reading my first post. Suddenly, you were posting about all the good things you have been seeing in your W's interactions. I think it had something to do with me saying I thought your M could be saved (plus, you've referenced to it). In fact, I wonder if you over-thought it. I'm not criticizing. I'm not the best at positively presenting what I want to say. I just mean that those words suddenly changed how you saw your W (or at least, that's how it sounded to me), until you had a dream that headed you in the other direction. After you overthought the dream, you had a bad day. The dream is not reality, and it's in your power to decide to have a great day, in spite of a bad dream or a good dream. You have to make the decision hour by hour, if necessary, to believe you are a person of valuable, whether something is said that you like or dislike......it should not change your self-value. Today, a mechanic said something that gave you a boost. That's fine, but don't overthink it.

If we had bad experiences as a child, our brain tries to replay those old tapes from our past hurts. Something happens in our present time that makes our memory flash to that painful time. Unfairness is a terrible thing for a child, but it is a preface for adulthood, IMHO. Life can be very unfair, but it doesn't get to decide how we feel. We have that God-given freedom to choose how we will feel. We have to learn to value ourselves, even if someone in our past or present does not hold the same value about us. Sure, we'd like for everyone to think the best of us, but it's just not that way in real life. Don't let someone else's opinion determine your worth as a person. Don't let someone's disrespectful treatment make that determination for you. If they have that kind of power, it's b/c you gave them the power to determine your worth. Maybe you did that to some extent as child, but as an adult, you are responsible for your own self worth and happiness. It's up to you to make yourself feel good about Oz. (((hugs)))

Watch YouTube, listen to tapes, read books, listen to good music, etc., to feed your soul. When we totally rely on someone else to direct our feelings about ourselves, our moods will constantly go up & down. When our happiness and self worth comes from within ourselves, then we can enjoy positive interactions and/or compliments........but we understand it does not determine who we are as a person. We enjoy the moment and move on. When it's not such a wonderful moment, or the words may not be what we desire to hear.........we still move on, b/c we determine if it will change how we view ourselves. Maybe we will decide to improve in a particular area. It shouldn't change our self-worth as a person. Does this make sense?

It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!