Well it's been a few days now. I feel much more settled in my feelings but I would still appreciate advice and suggestions from vets as to where to go from here.
It's very quiet all of a sudden.
H and I have been talking a little more. Or rather, he's been talking and I've been listening. I'm still pretty dark for myself and not disclosing much, but I am listening to what he wants to say. I think he knows I will 100% shut it down the second he gets disrespectful or abusive, and there's been none of that at all - but plenty of reflection from him on why he was acting that way. He doesn't seem to be blaming me or attempting to excuse or justify his actions any longer. Whether that is enough to consider R and starting the piecing journey, I do not know. I still feel very bruised and guarded. He's been very clear that the ball is in my court and where we go from here is up to me. Which feels fair and respectful of him, but also makes me feel a bit pressured.
I have the door open a tiny crack and it feels like something from me is needed before we go further and I don't know what.
