Why is it they now blame us for everything? Is it to justify their actions? Why and how does a person become so focused only on the negative? Why am I always painted as a bad guy?
B/c she won't/didn't take responsibility for her own happiness. It was easier to hold you responsible, although she did not about her negative mindset. It's all symptoms of developing a wayward mindset. She is hell bent on blaming you for whatever complaint she can find.
Some people are bound & determined to find something wrong with how you do thing. There was this man who could find nothing positive in his W's efforts, no matter how hard she tried to please him. One morning she asked him how he wanted his eggs cooked. He told he wanted one scrambled and the other egg fried. So, she prepared the eggs to the best of her ability and served her H. When he gazed upon his plate of food, he was furious. His poor W asked what was wrong. He said, "You fried the wrong egg"! So, there you have it. There's just no pleasing some folks.
On a more serious note, I don't know what to tell you how to make your D do something she refuses to do. She knows as long as her mother is nearby she doesn't have to obey you. Have you spoken with a child psychologist about how to deal with this problem?
She is at a very challenging age, and I can only imagine how her mother has planted unhealthy seeds in her mind. You definitely needs hands-on practical advice in dealing with both of them. (((hugs)))
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
