Maybe I know what to do 2

[SteveLW]

When I say I don’t get DBing. I mean it. I have been doing a lot of 4 already. Is that bad? I let her calls go to voicemail then I call back later. I don’t text and when she does I keep replies short

I really DO want to know. I would love to find out she isn’t cheating. But if she is what is the benefit to not knowing. Explain that please

When I was told I might have brain cancer they thought it might be a cyst. It was much harder not knowing. I wanted it to be a cyst REALLY bad. But the limbo was crushing me. When I found out it was cancer I was crushed. But then the wondering was gone. I had an objective. I just had to figure out best plan of attack

First, on doing #4, no you haven't. You've done a little, but not fully. As proven by the "want to go swimming" exchange.

And when you found out it was cancer, you took action! If you find out she is cheating, you need to be prepared to do the same.