Maybe I know what to do 2

[SteveLW]

Ok I'll answer. It is beta behavior. No an alpha wouldn't even be in this situation. If you had been an alpha before all of this you wouldn't be in this situation.

We have taught you DB principles since you first posted. Put those into action.

Get a babysitter Saturday night and go out, on your own! Avoid the casino. No good can come from you showing upp there.

I am guessing this (your previous post) is how the pre-BD ozman handled crisises. By hand wringing, and worrying. You know how much worrying has ever helped in a tough situation? SQUAT. That how much. So stop being a worrier and start focusing on how ozman can become AMOFWL. 180 on this beta behavior and go become that alpha.

I'd like for you to explain to me how, the above post, shows that you are working on detachment. I see a lot of maybes...what ifs......etc. If you are going to move forward, whether there is an EA or a PA, you need to stop focusing on her behavior. Do you know how much of her behavior you can control? ZERO NONE NADA ZIP So stop trying.

"This wedding tomorrow night. I wish there is some way I could stop it. It’s like watching a car crash about to happen but your paralyzed to stop it"

Yep it is like that because you have ZERO CONTROL. Even if you showed up at the wedding, and stopped it. Do you think you would prevent a PA? Do you know what lengths cheaters go to in order to cheat? And trust me, if they are going to cheat, then they may already have!! 13 years ago a best friend couple of ours started having trouble. The W started cheating on the H. When it all came out the W was meeting with her coworker and cheating ON THE WAY TO WORK. AT LUNCH. ON THE WAY HOME FROM WORK. They took vacation time and told their spouses they were going on business trips, which were really personal vacation trips together. If it is going to happen there is NOTHING you can do. NOTHING.

But none of that matters. The truth will come out. The truth always comes out. But I can tell you oz you have a lot of work to do to prepare for the truth. Because right now if the truth came out that she was in an EA and/or a PA, I fear it would destroy you. And that isn't AMOFWL.