Unchien, thanks. I agree with you actually. Me, the NG drove a lot of that behaviour and I admit that. NG play victim and I agree I fall in that trap still. You reminded me that my psy in IC doesn't like labels and yeah, whilst it helps me to make sense of my confusing world ultimately, leave it to the professionals for diagnisis.
Those are old behaviours driven by different people in a relationship that is now dead. As a recovering NG asserting boundaries and detaching this emotional baggage has not surfaced much for months. And that genuinely makes me happy, driving a positive feedback loop. And my emotinal baggage is, over time, being dealt with.
I'll take a page from No More Mr. NG and say that my W (STBXW, XW or whatever) is a gift, a gift to learn to be a better man and a better person. S is what was needed to break co-dependency and to learn how to live, through GAL and through spending time alone. I meant it when I say despite the sh*tty sitch, and that I'm not emotionally satisfied, I'm actually at the most happiest place in my life. And I can thank her for starting that journey for me.
