I am going to be that lighthouse. I have always tried to do the right thing in my life. My kids deserve me to do the right thing for them. Because I love my wife, I will also do the right thing for her. She might not know it, but the right thing is to work on saving our marriage, build a better relationship, and maintain a loving family for our kids. We brought these three beautiful kids into this world, and they deserve for us to fight to fix this for them.
I admire your integrity, I really do. But what is the "right" thing? I understand your argument, but she might argue that she is unhappy and making her stay in the M will just make both of you AND the kids unhappy. Think about how God shows us love, he does it by giving US the choice to live how we wish. "Free will". He doesn't intervene. So one might argue that the "right" thing to do is honor your W's wishes and give her what she wants. To give her the free will to choose, without you intervening in the process. Now you can stand, that is being the lighthouse. But "She might not know it, but the right thing is to work on saving our marriage"? No, you simply cannot make that choice for her, and you can't force it on her. You've got to let her go.
