I agree with this, Kiro. Without religion people tend to have no true values to get them to do the right thing when they want to rebel.
This goes for ourselves as well as our spouses. Sometimes we even BS ourselves. That a person is right for us clearly when we know that all that they are and do are all wrong for us. This is why the Bible clearly says that feelings can be deceived. It's nature to act on feelings and been that way since Adam and Eve. You need biblical principles to follow for God to guide you through your life rather than you doing it on your own "self independence" I freely admit though I am somewhat of a hypocrite because even though I know this I need to practice more of what I preach. I struggle a lot between the natural and the spiritual. I've been throwing this Dynamic out here and everyone for weeks now. You subtly see it movies like Fireproof. A man wants to be respected and trusted before he is loved. A woman wants to feel cherished and valued as well as respected and loved. Well what happens when you break your word, you disappoint, or you don't follow through. You are no longer respected. What happens when you rebell, disrespect, strive for self Independence and false confidence. Yes you grow and you empower yourself. But I'm willing to bet the next relationship won't last for the very long whole maybe short-term? Confidence income from two places either God himself, or from experience in the world. Otherwise it is self-inflating, And over compensating for some hidden insecurities. The heart can be deceived and feelings can lead us to all the wrong places even though we think it's right in pursuing them. It may also by chance lead us to the right places as well. What God is the creator Who would know better than him and his patrons that gave testimony to him and Jesus Christ. When we think we can do whatever we want that's when we feel the most pain whether five years from now or ten years from now. We have to learn to stay on the steady course. There is one for you. God reconciled himself to man for their sins and their nature who died for us to save us. I understand that people should leave if they are in a very bad in threatening situation. But IMO, not to reconcile yourself to your spouse or even make an attempt to because of all of your conflicts disagreements resentments feelings excetera and lack of understanding, cannot reconcile yourself to what Corinthians in the Apostle Paul says about marriage. But even with the horse he clearly says that he wants us to go in peace. So sometimes it is a better option. Speaking of options isn't it funny how we always compare our options outside of our own relationship and marriage? That we want to happy for filling life and that moment All That season for a Time, but we have no idea what could happen in the future for us whether we split or whether we try again. People might grow or people might change your people might fall apart. Something profound that I realizd is. Yes we have to self differentiate codependent, but do not keep a lifetime commitment means we couldn't keep any commitments to ourselves in the first place, as far as always working and improving on ourselves as individuals
