Making the best of the mess.

[97Hope]

Do you have a longer term plan for your future after s moves out? Have you had legal information about what you're entitled to in terms of maintenance and a settlement, should it come to that? Are you worried your H might get into debt or otherwise act irresponsibly and do you have a need to factor that into your decision making process? I hate to ask this - but if there's an OW or a risk of one, do you need to wonder what might happen if he creates another financial responsibility for himself and how that may affect your youngest's college tuition? You might not want to file yourself, but knowing what the future might look like if your H does decide to file might help you prepare for that. It might also be a positive process for you. I have been really inspired by the way that Yail has been dreaming about and moving towards her ideal future on her thread. I'm not there yet myself but I look forward to getting there!

No plans for long-term. I can only do day-by-day, TBH. When I go too far out, I start to crack. I have some vague wishes, but nothing that needs a plan. I.e. - find a place in proximity to the kids, but not on top of H etc. I'm currently getting my certification in Biblical Counseling - so my plans are for no matter what, nothing that hinges on what H does/doesn't do. That's one way I can cope with this whole thing. Finding what I want for my future that doesn't need H to do something. I'm ok either way at this point - although sometimes the idea of life with him is scarier than a life without him. So I just stay in the moment ; )